Men facing divorce do some stupid things; divorce for men is not easy. Making it worse is that there are lots of support groups for women, but divorce help for men is pretty sparse. Men also face a cultural bias that favors women in divorce and the courts are so overloaded that little thoughtful judgment is taken in regard to key matters.
Emotion is running rampant and regardless of who gets the house, who gets the kids, and who gets screwed financially, you are already facing one of the biggest loses that anyone faces in life. The loss of a spouse. Maybe it’s been bad for a long time but even so there are usually bitter-sweet feelings and some serious emotions to deal with in any divorce.
During this time you have important decisions to make and things that you must do or you will pay for them for a long time. Men go wrong by not getting their head around the big things they must do to win their divorce. Here are the four really big mistakes that men make in divorce:
- Failure to prepare for divorce. You must prepare, you must learn about the process, and you must plan. Failure to plan your divorce and what your outcome is is planning to fail. If you want to know how to win your divorce step one is plan, know your outcome. President Eisenhower, who as a General had planned and successfully executed the D-Day invasion of Europe said: “The plan is nothing but planning is everything.” Knowing your outcome will keep your mind locked in and enable you to navigate through the divorce minefield.
- Failure to realize that they must manage their attorney. Divorce lawyers for men deal with the same stuff over and over and they can get tired. You must be on top of the details of your case and know what is happening and what is possible and what the best strategy is to get there. Don’t trust this to your divorce lawyer, you have the most at stake and you should take charge.
- Not learning how to win a divorce. Heck many men go to court not knowing that it is even possible to win. As with most things in life it’s 90% what you believe that determines your actions and success in any endeavor. If you don’t believe that a desired outcome is possible then you will lose heart at the beginning and lose the rest of it when you go to court. You can win if you learn the strategies and tactics.
- Putting too much trust in their soon to be Ex. Don’t believe that she won’t take the advantage if you let her. She no longer has your best interest at heart, and she shouldn’t. Neither should you keep her best interest at heart. This doesn’t mean that you should be an SOB but rather keep your eyes on your own needs and goals and tend to those – let her do the same for herself.
If divorce has come into your life and you are a man, you need insider information to come out of divorce court without losing everything. Divorce For Men will help you arrive at a settlement that is fair for you. http://www.squidoo.com/DivorceForMen is divorce help for men.
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